Wow, somebody found my blog! lol You've inspired a new post!
One of the biggest problems with writing about my depression is that I feel like it's going to sound like whining. I can relate the problems I've had with depression but still it's there, the emotional abandonment I suffered as a child, being sent off to a boarding school that I called, "A Jewish Home for Orphans and Other So-Sos," the inability to find a lasting relationship until I was nearly 30 (which ended 10 years later) and so on.
The thing is, the depression infects every aspect of my life, not just how I feel but how much I eat which in turn has caused a number of physical problems such as diabetes, high blood pressure, morbid obesity, etc. I'm also emotionally needy and a bit clingy, and at nearly 51 years old, there aren't many women who want an emotionally stunted guy for a mate.
I basically spend most of my time coping with the depression by living as stress-free a life as I can. It means I'm mostly a shut-in because I also suffer from social anxiety. It's so bad that sometimes I can't even walk to the local Safeway to go shopping. Sometimes the mailbox is too far away for me to comfortably go to.
That's about all I've got to say at this time, but maybe I'll be inspired to write a bit more often.